Have you ever wondered why most relationships fail?

Have you ever wondered why most relationships fail?

Aside from the fact that everyone has a different experience of reality, there are a number of key reasons why relationships struggle to stand the test of time. 

The first reason is if you don’t understand or appreciate your values and the values of the person you are in relationship with. Let’s say for example there are two people in a relationship and one person’s highest value is freedom. If they are in a relationship with someone whose highest value is security these two people are going to want very different things in life (and from each other). Most conflicts in life and relationships occur because of conflicting values. In our Master Practitioner training we explore your personal values, and how to align these in relation to any conflicts you may have.

This doesn’t mean you have to have the EXACT same values as your partner, but it does mean it helps to understand (and even appreciate the contrast of) their values and how they can in fact complement each other.

The second reason most relationships fail is due to having too many negative associations (also known as anchors) from past interactions. Let’s say every tme you have an argument your partner makes a certain tone of voice or facial expression. This can become stacked over time and these stacked associations become more and more emotionally charged over time. If you can learn to collapse anchors (something we teach in our NLP Practitioner training) then you can see people newly and stop projecting past situations onto the present moment. Because our relationships are often reflections of our past it’s crucial to learn how to reduce these negative assocaitions and see people in the present moment for who they are.

Thirdly, you may not truly understand your own love strategies. We have unconscious strategies for how we do everything in life, including how we are convinced that something is good or bad for us or whether we are in love with someone or not. What if your partner has a different love strategy to you? Imagine you knew the key to unlocking your partner’s love strategy… how much would that enhance your relationship? In our Master Practitioner course we dive deeper into your unconscious strategies so you can understand them and even start to refine them to help you feel more fulfilled in life.

And lastly… you may be unaware of ways that you could be projecting your unresolved shadow traits onto our partner. We all have positive and negative shadow traits and understanding our own shadow and this truly is a gamechanger when it comes to relationships. As anything that annoys or triggers you about others could be an indication of your own unhealed shadow. 

If you want to dive deeper into this concept Juliet and Paul are hosting a Relationships Workshop this month for $10 donation (going to charity) on 14 November at 7.30pm Adelaide time. Click this link to register to join – and if you can’t make it live you will be sent the replay within 48 hours. 

If you are curious to learn more about our courses, pop here to see our course dates and please also click here to book a course enquiry call.

Keep Evolving!

 

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